The Marauders Who Don't Do Anything
by Fantasy's Whisper
Summary: Oneshot. Sirius, Peter and James are bored in the common room. They decide to wake Lily and give her a little theatrical show about the Marauders. R&R


Disclaimer: The song belongs to Veggie Tales, and all Harry Potter components to Miss JK Rowling.

**Author's Note: Just a little scene that I imagined in my head, I thought it was funny and that I should share it with you.**

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><p><strong>The Marauders Who Don't Do Anything<strong>

Lily was snoozing quietly in one of the comfy armchairs in the common room. A book lay across her stomach, limply in her hand. The common room itself was empty save for the three boys sitting over by the fire, heads bent over a piece of parchment.

James kept looking up at the fiery haired girl in the chair across the room.

"Prongs will you pay attention please!" Sirius cried indignantly, "What does Evans have that I don't have? I'm galleons better looking than her!"

James shook his head and smiled. He couldn't resist gazing at Lily nor could he help how in love with her he was.

"I'm bored," Peter said, "And hungry."

"Then why don't you go down to the kitchens Wormtail," Sirius murmured turning back to the parchment.

"But Sirius," Peter whispered as if he was telling a huge secret, "It's dark."

Sirius burst into laughter, Peter was the wimpiest seventeen year old boy he'd ever met there were first years braver than him. He looked at Prongs wondering why he wasn't laughing too. Once again James wasn't paying the slightest attention to his friends.

"I think we should wake Evans up, I've got the best idea for it too!" Sirius shouted and got up.

He started poking Lily in the stomach, softly at first and then harder until she opened her eyes and glared at him.

"Black you had better stop poking me before I remove your finger." She said icily.

"But Evans, my dear, I'm bored," Sirius replied as if he was a child.

James glared at his best mate, if he'd even gotten close to Lily he would have been hexed into oblivion already.

"Why don't you and your little friends go find something to do then," Lily muttered and lifted up her book.

"But Lily-flower, we don't do anything!"

James and Peter moaned as Sirius used his wand to create music.

_We are the marauders who don't do anything  
>We just stay at home and lie around<br>And if you ask us to do anything  
>We'll just tell you we don't do anything<em>

Sirius was now bouncing up and down as he continued singing. Peter started to bounce too. James just smirked at his friends' ridiculousness.

_Well I've never been to Greenland  
>And I've never been to Denver<br>And I've never buried treasure in St. Louie or St. Paul  
>And I've never been to Moscow<br>And I've never been to Tampa  
>And I've never been to Boston in the fall<em>

James laughed and joined in with Sirius's terribly off-key singing.

_We are the marauders who don't do anything  
>We just stay at home and lie around<br>And if you ask us to do anything  
>We'll just tell you we don't do anything<em>

Sirius pointed to James,

_And I've never hoist the main sail  
>And I've never swabbed the poop deck<br>And I've never veer to starboard  
>'Cause I never sail at all<em>

_And I've never walked the gangplank_  
><em>And I've never owned a parrot<em>  
><em>And I've never been to Boston in the fall<em>

They wrapped their arms around each other's shoulders and sang together.

_'Cause we're the marauders who don't do anything  
>We just stay at home and lie around<br>And if you ask us to do anything  
>We'll just tell you we don't do anything<em>

Peter ran up between them, looking for his own time to shine.

_Well I've never plucked a rooster  
>And I'm not too good at ping ball<br>And I've never thrown my mashed potatoes  
>Up against the wall<em>

_And I've never kissed a chipmunk_  
><em>And I've never gotten head lice<em>  
><em>And I've never been to Boston in the fall.<em>

Sirius stopped the music and looked at Peter dumbfounded, "Huh? What are you talking about?"

"What's a rooster and mashed potatoes have to do with being a marauder?" James asked confused. "We're supposed to sing about marauder-y things."

"And who's ever kissed a chipmunk? That's just nonsense! Why even bring it up? Am I right? What do you think?"

"I think you look like Captain Crunch," James smirked as he conjured up a blue captain's hat and shoved it on Sirius's head.

"Huh? No I don't!"

"Do too"

"Do not!" Sirius shouted.

Peter looked at Sirius, "You're making me hungry."

Sirius turned to James, "That's it you're walking the plank!"

"Says who?" James raised an eyebrow.

"Says the Cap'n, that's who!"

"Oh yeah? Ay ay, Cap'n Crunch!" James tried to keep a straight face as he saluted Sirius.

Sirius stared at James, then tackled him to the floor.

"Yikes!" Peter cried as he jumped out of the way.

_And I've never licked a spark plug  
>And I've never sniffed a stinkbug<br>And I've never painted daises  
>On a big red rubber ball<em>

_And I've never bathed in yogurt_  
><em>And I don't look good in leggings<em>

"You just don't get it Wormtail," Sirius said from the floor where he held James in a headlock.

"Hey where'd Lily go?" James looked at the now vacant chair, the common room was empty except for them.

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><p>Lily was sound asleep in her bed. Dreaming of a certain Gryffindor with untidy jet-black hair and beautiful hazel eyes, he had quite the singing voice as well.<p>

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Hope it amused you as much as it amused me.<strong>


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